Saturday, May 27, 2017

25 down, __ to Go

I'm finishing my 25th year at Urbandale High School this month. I suppose I could make some grand statement about investing a quarter of a century of my life to this career and this high school, but I'll save that speech for my retirement.

You're welcome.

Retirement. What a strange concept. If the rule of 88 is still the rule of thumb, then I can retire in eight years when Charlotte finishes ninth grade. Considering how fast her first grade year went, ninth grade is right around the corner. Parenting creates a duality in time. That's how her school year went faster than mine.

Daphne will still have several years of teaching ahead of her when I reach the rule of 88, so I doubt we will buy a RV and ride off into the highway's sunset. If I'm done with teaching in 2025, then I'd have to get another job. I have no idea what that would be. In a general sense, I'd like a job where I can work with my hands. Unfortunately, the robots will probably take those jobs.

Okay, enough rambling about what might happen. I want to talk about what did happen. Since I'm talking about 25 years of school, let's do some math.

Average number of times someone has asked me if they can go to the bathroom during one class period: 4 - that is a conservative estimate.
Number of class periods with students in the room per day: 7.
Number of times I was asked, "Can I go to the bathroom?" per day: 28.
Number of days in a school year: 180.
Number of times I was asked, "Can I go to the bathroom?" in a school year: 5,040.
Number of times I was asked, "Can I go to the bathroom?" in 25 years: 126,000.
Number of times the inquiring student actually had to go to the bathroom: 7.

Actually, I want my next job to be one where I'm not lied to so often.

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